Fall Promo: The “Monkey” books

The “Monkey” books
Okay, yes, shameless promotion because marketing is soul-sucking,
and hey,
my books, my blog!

But really, if you like humor and mystery and autumn, I bet you’d like my “Monkey” books.

It all started with the soft opening of my meditation retreat. I thought it would be an easy practice run. A handful of guests, yoga, meditation, good food, and relaxation. Yeah, well, there’s always what you want to happen vs. what really happens, right? Let’s just say that the weekend was murder and about killed my business dead.

Business limped along until an uptick at Halloween. All of a sudden, I had Wiccans, preppers, a weight loss club, drag queens and cryptozoologists as guests. All at the same time!

The Wiccans wanted to use my meditation circle for their Samhain ceremonies, while

Dr. Crypto and his pals were setting up trail cameras to catch a Skunk Ape–

The drag queens were rocking it into the night —

The preppers were planning for TEOTWAWKI (The End of the World As We Know It)

And some of the weight loss club members were taking liberties with the diet–

things went French farce as several guests, including my yoga instructor, went missing.


Skunk Ape abduction?

Or something else?

Monkey Heart will tickle your funny bones!

So, if you’re looking for something fun to read to get you in the autumn mood, check out the “Monkey” books. More mayhem to come! I’m about to publish the next one in time for Christmas:

Psst! Haint Blue is a fictional character
from Author J. Elliott

Hedonistic Hound Press has a Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/HedonisticHoundPress/

and a website:


Monkey Mind and Monkey Heart

Beach season is almost over, but in case you are looking for your next book, check out my little promo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ay5MIAeUAFs

Most of the time, monkey mind is annoying. You know, that blah-blah chatter in your head all the time. But you’ll enjoy this Monkey Mind, a funny murder mystery. Join me, Haint Blue, at my retreat in Catfish Springs, Florida. You’d think it would be all tranquil abiding, meditation and yoga, nature walks and gourmet food. Trust me, things get tense when the weather, feisty wildlife, and difficult guests, make for a killer weekend.

Monkey Heart picks up where Monkey Mind left off. After a totally dead month business-wise, bookings suddenly pick up for Halloween.


a weight loss club

a group of Wiccans


and drag queens

on Halloween?

You get French farce, Monkey Heart. Guests go missing. Uh-oh. Did they leave on their own? Were they murdered? Abducted by a Skunk Ape?

While worrying if someone or something may have absconded with my guests, Buster, the Bigfoot hunter, was stealing my heart.

And coming this winter:

I thought I was going to run off to the beach to unwind for the holidays. Everyone else had holiday plans. I just wanted to disappear. Sit on the beach. Read a book. Nap. Binge-watch cold case file shows.


You know how there’s what you plan, and then there’s what happens? Aunt Moira tried to warn me. “I had a dream you needed to stock your pantry. You’re going to have guests.”

I didn’t believe her at first. Silly me! An interstate accident, a plumbing backup, a testy gas stove, a trailer fire, a visiting pregnant alpaca–just a few of the elements that made Christmas in Catfish Springs something quite memorable.


The Detour

So, there’s this little culvert just down the road. Doesn’t seem like much of anything. Most of the time it’s dry, unless we get a gully washer, then it becomes a true creek. I never dreamed it would be such an undertaking to repair it. Trucks and loads of dirt, rocks and concrete chunks just keep coming. For weeks. We haven’t seen any actual work yet though sometimes we see dudes sitting in the shade with sandwiches. 

The guy just laughs when I ask how long it’ll be before the road opens again. 

Figures. There’s always something, isn’t there? A detour in the road, a kink in the hose? 

Don’t let it stop you from visiting Blue’s Lotus Lodge. We’re open!

Find your way to Catfish Springs via Amazon–Monkey Mind is available in paperback and as an ebook:   https://tinyurl.com/yagcfmd5


ARNIE, or There’s Your Sign…

When I bought the Stinkin’ Skunk Ape Fish Camp, it came with Arnie, the concrete camp mascot. He’s tacky as it gets and has nothing to do with meditation that I can think of, but he makes me laugh and Max, the previous owner, now in a retirement home was keen on him. It seemed disrespectful and sad to think of getting rid of him. So I got him cleaned up and replaced the sign for the office. 

What Color is Your Mid-Life Crisis?

     Some folks, when they come into money buy big-ticket items: a house, a boat, a Mazeratti. I bought a dilapidated fish camp.

     Sexy, huh?haint-standing-touched-up-oil-look

    My dream was to convert it into a meditation retreat and host classes in yoga and mindfulness. It seemed like a good idea at the time. After fixing it up for over a year: dragging out the leaky bait freezer to find it had ruined the floor, repairing guest cabins, converting the boat house into a meditation hall, adding a full kitchen and dining hall, I was finally ready for my opening weekend. The theme was “Finding Inner Peace.”
     My best friend, Lorraine Chapman, and my super brother, Iggy, signed on to help teach yoga and tai chi.
     With only a few days to go, I suddenly realized I had focused on the food and the accommodations, and forgot to get the grounds mowed and the vines and poison ivy cleared. In desperation, I hired Bob.
      Well, there’s always how you want it to work out, and what really happens. Between Bob, the guests, the wildlife and the weather, the weekend was anything but peaceful…
     I hope you’ll read all about it in my first book, Monkey Mind.

Edy-Mae, inspiration for Naughty Britches